I need my Mom.

My heart is so sore, I only heard yesterday that my mom collapsed at home on Saturday last week, and then spent the week in hospital.  I had been trying to phone her but her phone has been off, so I thought she was just busy and I decided to try and call her this week again.  She didn't want anyone to tell me, but phoned me herself last night.  The saddest thing is that the person on the phone wasn't my mom.  She didn't sound like herself at all, and she couldn't talk properly.

She was so excited about coming here in August - and always said she wanted to be here the day the baby comes, and I kept telling her we will see closer to the time because I need to settle in at home first.  I feel so selfish for saying that, and not wanting her here.

I asked her to tell me what was wrong, and she said it was just stress.  I knew it can't be that.  I just told her I love her and she must get better and I hope to see her really soon.  I need my little boy to know his granny.

I got hold of my aunt today and she said my mom had a stroke, but I shouldn't worry because my step dad is taking really good care of her, and I mustn't be too hard on her if I do speak to her.  The road to recovery is going to be long.

I pray with all my heart that she gets better.  I'm going to be a mother soon and I need my mom.  I don't know if I can do this without her.

If she's not better by the end of the year and hasn't been able to come visit us, we will try make plans to go and see her and the family in December.